What's On My Mind Tonight...

Good evening fair readers! (Or, reader, as the case may be.) I know it’s been awhile, and there’s a reason. Tonight…I’m not talking Town…and let me tell you why. Most of you know what I do for a living…or at least that I work. LOL. I work for the NC Association of Educators…which, in most states, would be the teacher’s union. I don’t bargain contracts…I facilitate professional development for educators, among other things, in my role at NCAE. One of the biggest pieces of work that I do is coordinate support for candidates for National Board Certification. In the past month, I’ve spent most of my time, awake and asleep, planning for a series of workshops that are occurring this spring for candidates. The biggest of these is our Boot Camp, a get-away to work weekend for candidates to be able to come to Raleigh, sit and work that we held for the very first time this year. We decided to offer this workshop when we realized that there were absolutely not going to be enough spaces at NCCAT for all the candidates – a record 5900 candidates this year thanks to the General Assembly’s threat to discontinue funding – and so we came up with this idea.

So…last week, as final preparations were underway…it snowed. And even though NCAE was closed on Monday, Tuesday AND Wednesday of last week…I slogged my behind into my office and worked on Tuesday and Wednesday, after having spent time on the weekend working on different things for the session, getting ready for this event. It was a big deal to me! J Those of us who worked on it, worked very hard. I cannot say thank you enough to Jasmine Hart, Beth Edwards, Monica Webb, Jennifer Elmo, Angela Farthing, Cathy Barnes, Naomi Chisolm, and Sheri Strickland. Without them, it wouldn’t have happened. There were many others involved, and I appreciate you all…but without those eight, there’s no way it would have been pulled off.

For this event I was, for all intents and purposes, the lead. So…if it succeeds, I’m partially responsible…and if it fails…it’s all mine. We did all kinds of little things to prepare. We had tote bags made, and in the bags, we put pens, pencils, Post Its, snack bars, and a folder of materials for candidates so that they could choose whether or not to attend mini-sessions. And God bless my mother, she spent a week baking and cooking and made treat bags for every single one of the 325 candidates that were there. I was intent on making this a special experience for each and every candidate that was in attendance.

So…why am I writing about it?

Well…let’s just say it got a little larger than I planned for it to. It really needed to be about 250 or less…but, when all of the registrations come in on one day, how do you select from the 150 registrations that arrive on one day to determine which 75 to turn away? So, we chose not to, in fairness. And to be honest, in reflecting on the event, I think we did fairly well with the size of the group we had. I had many positive comments from many of the participants – and about 1/3 of them are coming back for a second round at the end of the month.

So why has this gotten me up in arms? Because I sent out an evaluation survey. Now, when I ask for criticism, I’m truly asking for it – but I also ask for constructive criticism. Telling me something sucked (their words) doesn’t tell me anything. Sometimes, for some reason, folks take an evaluation as an opportunity to be as mean and nasty as they possibly can. It never ceases to amaze me…but I sure do look at evaluations differently than I used to.

I don’t do anything that I do – whether it be work, volunteering, my work with the Town as mayor, any of it – for praise. If it comes, great, but truth be told, about 60% of the work that I do will go completely unnoticed or credited to someone else. It’s the nature of the work that I do, and my personality…and I’m just fine with that. You see…my mission in life is to leave this world better than how I found it.

Some folks do all they can to work against such a mission. I could care less if anyone says, “Elic did this.”

However, it’s a hard pill to swallow when you work yourself sick – literally, to the point that you have to take a day off just to sleep – losing time from your personal life, losing time with your family, ignoring other pertinent priorities, calling on others to help keep your life going so this one thing will go off as well as it can, and folks are just mean the very thing you've been working yourself to death on. Just absolutely rude! “I got nothing accomplished.” “I paid $100 just to stay in the hotel room for two days.” “I could have saved $100 and stayed home.” "What a waste of my time." "The food was horrible."

Is there really a need to make such comments? I already knew these things! When the FIRST THING that greets you on the FIRST DAY of something is to be blessed out, it’s not going to be a great day. I also don’t understand why it is that those folks that have such good things to say NEVER FILL OUT AN EVALUATION! I think it’s something along the same lines as the theorem of student attendance…the worst kid you ever teach will never miss a day of school.

It takes a lot to push me over the edge. It takes a HUGE amount for me to write about it. I asked for feedback. I didn’t ask for abuse. I’ve had more than one person tell me, “You know…you have the patience of Job.” Most days I do…because I know what it’s like to work your butt off and have things go awry. I’ve planned events that involve months and months of work and thousands of dollars and hours of preparation and work only to see it rain. (And I’m not just talking about Frankenfest on Main, either.) So, when I go to an event, a conference, a workshop, a concert, a convention, or whatever, and something goes wrong, I smile and ask what I can do to help. Why? BECAUSE I’VE BEEN THERE AND IT AIN’T PRETTY. Take life as it comes…what is the use in getting so angry? The only person you’re affecting is yourself! Anger does nothing to someone else – it only does something to you! Take a moment and remember how far a kind word will go! How far a hug will get you!

My advice to anyone who ever has to complete an evaluation is this..if you can’t be constructive, and you can’t be nice…be quiet. Say thank you, and stay home next time. Don’t involve yourself next time. But don’t be rude or hateful just because the opportunity presents itself. The bridge to Heaven isn’t built with rudeness, but the many opportunities to be rude that you pass by.

Now…for the positivity. Yes, I still have some. J By Saturday afternoon of Boot Camp, I’d reached my breaking point, and when I was thanking the fantastic NBCTs who did such a wonderful job and did nothing but assist me and stopped at nothing to make sure that every plan I’d laid was put into play…I broke. I didn’t mean to…but the emotion blew right past my gates, and I cried for a second. And I meant every word I said…and every tear I shed. But you know what was pretty cool? After I finished, someone shouted, 'Thank you Elic!' and the ENTIRE ROOM stood up and clapped. That was one of the most validating experiences I've had in many, many moons. I couldn't look up...because I'd have lost it if I had. So many candidates stopped me to say thank you. And it's those thank yous, it's those "I think I can do this now!" comments that prevent me from going postal. :)

I shouldn't name names...but I'm going to. Kris Biddle, thank you for bringing me a surprise treat. I didn’t even get to eat it during the weekend. Bring me a refill. I promise, this time on Friday I’ll eat more than a Reese’s Cup. Betty Shirley, thank you for helping out with everything we needed from 2:00 until we got started at 5:00 on Thursday afternoon. I couldn’t have asked for a better assist, and it was truly appreciated – and you didn’t have to do it. Shannan Benton, I received your note. It means more than you know...you are a blessing. Janet Courson, I got the e-mail on Facebook…and I smiled a lot...and I shared it with my mom. :) Krista McGuire, I read your e-mail on Thursday night and literally started crying. Beth Edwards can prove it. It meant the world. To all of you who’ve sent e-mails, sent cards, sent notes...THANK YOU. I’m keeping them all.

I have this thing called a Blue Day file. (Thanks , Judy Darling.) All of these notes are going in it. And when I read comments like, “this just was a waste of my time and money,” I'll pull those out…and they'll warm me right up. As Ashley Montgomery told me on my Facebook page a few days ago…”Just think about the number of candidates you’ve touched, and the number of students whose education experiences will change.” That’s what keeps me going. That’s what puts me to sleep at night.

And speaking of…it’s time for bed.

Annie…I know it’s not my norm…I don’t usually talk about the job. But, that’s what’s on my mind tonight. Hopefully, I’ll get to be a little more regular. But then again…everytime I say that…well, you know the rest.

Night friends. Thanks for being there.